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    ‘We Are Not There’

    The race for U.S. Senate in Illinois between Democrat Barack Obama and transplant Republican from Maryland Alan Keyes has immediately ratcheted into the stratosphere on social issues. Keyes has already called Obama’s abortion views “the slaveholders’ position.” More: In the same interview, [Keyes] defended his belief that gay marriage…
    Locker Room contributor, August 10, 2004
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    Re: Eating the family pet

    Chad, that’s truly an inspirational story. It’s touching how you learned that your dear pet had one more stop on the way to fishy heaven. Regarding Greyson, I was struck by Suzana’s admission that sale of the family pet for meat “had given me one-fifth of my yearly income.” Also,…
    Locker Room contributor, August 9, 2004
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    Eating your pets

    Jon, Just wanted you to know I cried my way through the Greyson story. I can recall fishing with my grandfather, learning to bait and set the hook and then placed my new “pet” on a stringer. Oh the agony of it all. . We placed several pets on…
    Locker Room contributor, August 9, 2004
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    Our Next Contestant Is…

    The Global TransPark couldn’t attract Boeing to Kinston, and now apparently has lost the consolation prize. Please accept these lovely parting gifts as our thanks for playing with us today.
    Locker Room contributor, August 9, 2004
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    The institute for what?

    This Lexington (KY) Herald-Leader article on the “declining attendance and budget difficulties [that] have threatened to darken the stage” for the outdoor drama Daniel Boone: The Man and the Legend. Toward the end, you’ll read this: “Overall, attendance at outdoor dramas is down, according to the University of…
    Locker Room contributor, August 9, 2004
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    How to guilt-trip your rebellious teenager

    “When her teenaged son announced that he wanted to eat beef, Suzanna Hough didn’t run to the grocery store. A Carolina art student documented their story.”…
    Locker Room contributor, August 9, 2004
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    Did You Know…

    …that: * The United States has 53 states but the “flag has not yet been updated to reflect the addition of the last three states” — Hawaii, Alaska and Puerto Rico? * World War II began in 1938 and ended in 1942? * There are two houses of Congress —…
    Locker Room contributor, August 9, 2004
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    Re: Bill Bloodies Krugman

    I couldn’t help but take a look at the transcript to Russert’s show, which included this exchange: Mr. O’REILLY: …what Krugman (wants) is the government to run the economy. Kerry’s going to create 10 million jobs or 30 million, whatever he’s going to do. What I want is the…
    Locker Room contributor, August 9, 2004