In the United States, 22% of children live in households susceptible to food insecurity, and 33% are overweight. Assuming only a small portion of the malnourished are obese, only half of American children have fallen prey to unhealthy societal pressures to obsess over perfect body image.

I am sorry, but the day I take the obesity crisis seriously will be the day when fat people in public office stop telling me to be more anorexic. Besides, what harm can come from cramming corporate candy bars in my face as I blog on the sofa when government is building greenways and sidewalks to combat my obesity?