Oh, my. We wondered what Jim Black was up to. Never imagined it was this crock. Although in retrospect in makes an odd kinda sense. Jim Black spent an entire career getting away with stuff because he claimed he did so in the name of the Poor and Downtrodden.

Even as his empire was coming undone Black was praised for trying to do the right thing. Remember this howler from the Uptown paper of record after Black’s February guilty plea?

Perhaps the saddest thing about Mr. Black’s flawed stewardship of the House is that his policy instincts were in line with our state’s most pressing priorities. He focused on education, jobs and other human needs. He was an uncommonly effective spokesman for the interests of this region.

That bit of sewage directly enabled this stunning proposal from Black attorney’s today:

Former House Speaker Jim Black, having pleaded guilty to charges of public corruption, wants to stay out of prison so he can give free eye exams and eyeglasses to the poor.

In court papers filed Monday, Black submitted an 11-page business plan for the optometry clinic and said it could be running within days. He has been an optometrist for more than 40 years, often seeing patients when not in Raleigh on legislative business.

Black suggests he could give the free exams five days a week from his own offices, giving 2,000 exams a year at a benefit to the taxpayers of $543,882.

“This plan would allow Dr. Black to serve his punishment in a way that is beneficial to the community at large,” his attorneys wrote. “This plan would save the taxpayers considerable money, and would provide indigent children with corrective vision services that would otherwise go unattended.”

No. To quote Sue Myrick, Hell no.

Jim Black, on the eve of his sentencing for a felony, is still campaigning, still looking for a deal. And it gets worse.

Prosecutors say Black has not cooperated at all as his plea deal requires. Big surprise there. Of course not — he plans to appeal this whole mess. Why? Because he can. Because the secret donors to his legal expense fund let him do so.

Is anyone in Official Charlotte going to take a stand on this man’s abuse of the system?

Didn’t think so.

Update: The AP reports this little nugget:

Black’s leniency request included excerpts of letters of support from Jim Woodward, the former chancellor at UNC Charlotte; Harold Edwards, the former U.S. attorney for Western North Carolina; and Black’s previous patients.